Talk talk talk
All we ever seem to do is talk about problems.
But sometimes it’s a good thing. Like today, I wrote Mr B an email and asked him to read it properly. It was long but it kind of boiled down everything I’ve tried to communicate in the little snippets of time that we snatch for ourselves.
It helped. We had a phone conversation that actually got us somewhere. I know he’s a good person and he doesn’t mean any harm. But occasionally does harm. And I need to be a little more patient, not explode with anger every time he does something that I don’t think is right. And he needs to not do so many things that aren’t right.
He reassured me that he wants more than anything for our relationship to work. Because he loves me more than he’s ever loved anyone. That’s saying a lot for a man that was married for 18 years. And I know he’s not lying.
So yes, I feel better now.
But I am slightly irritated by the fact that his ex-wife decided that today was a good day for her to come and stay in her basement flat downstairs. Oh, there’s no way she’s going to be in my way but just the thought of her there makes me itch. Her excuse? She has a doctor’s appointment nearby. Only she has a car and it takes her three minutes longer to go from her own home to the doctor’s than it does to go from here. So it’s really not a good excuse but we can’t exactly forbid her to stay in her own flat.
My first instinct was to bolt, in fact I actually asked a colleague if I could stay at her place tonight if I needed to. Which she said yes to. But after Mr B’s and my conversation I felt reassured and when I got home and saw his ex’s car outside I didn’t really feel worried or anxious at all. I’m not going to back down just because she’s here because she certainly will find out about it and I’m sure she will think it’s some kind of victory.
So I’m sitting up here, holding my ground.
I just wish this could all be over. It’s not much fun fighting for a relationship. But I’m still pretty sure it’s worth fighting for.
[...] I had a nice evening yesterday. Mr B and I had another talk and we seem to be moving towards each other. At the same time I’m slightly worried that for [...]
And again « The Divorcée said this on October 2, 2008 at 10:23 am |
Sounds like progress to me. Good for you!
Yes, slowly things seem to be moving forward. Poor B was looking quite harrowed yesterday though. He’s worried it’s all too much for me to take.